The child advocate did not return a call for comment.

Steven's behavior didn't help his grandparents' case, the lawyer noted. The boy, who was diagnosed with developmental problems, was rambunctious during the March court hearing, at one point requiring Collazzo to chase and corral him.

''His being excited was used to their detriment, unfortunately,'' said Collazzo.

Nationwide, about 2.5 million grandparents are responsible for the basic needs of a grandchild living with them, according to U.S. Census figures.

Child welfare experts say age cannot be the only factor in determining the best placement for a dependent child. Other considerations include a caregiver's health, emotional stability, and whether there are support systems and plans for respite.

Relatives are generally preferred over foster families, experts say, but that can be trumped in an effort to give the child a more permanent placement.

''You want that home environment to be as strong as possible and as stable as possible,'' said Deborah Whitley, director of Georgia State University's National Center on Grandparents Raising Grandchildren.

The Brasovankins seem to offer such an environment, so the grandparents' ages seem to be the only reason for Steven's foster care placement, said Lynne Gold-Bikin, an attorney specializing in family law.

''If they were younger, we wouldn't be talking,'' Gold-Bikin said. ''The only thing that's standing between them and having custody of this child is their age.''

The Brasovankins were anguished when officials with the city Department of Human Services, following the judge's 90-day placement order, returned Steven to foster care in June. And they were outraged at the way they say it was done: picking up the boy from school without their knowledge.

''They actually stole him. They kidnapped him,'' Morris said.

A department spokeswoman said the agency would not comment on the case.

Steven is now living about 14 miles away from his grandparents at a home in Blue Bell. The Brasovankins said Steven's father gets to visit the boy once every other week for two hours. A lawyer for the father did not return calls for comment.

Steven sees his grandparents once a week, for an hour, at a social services agency. It's a heartbreaking situation, said Morris, as he climbed the stairs of his three-story row house to show off the boy's room and toys.

''He had everything going for him here,'' Morris said. ''What's too old? Who says when a person's old or not too old?''